I am an idiot. When I was working the Omaha Funny Bone, Z92's Todd and Tyler dared me to run on a treadmill, in studio, for their entire morning show. Like a macho moron, I took their challenge. I ran from 6:05am until 10:15am, taking only pee breaks during commericals. The first picture is of the Funny Bone's lovely Colleen Quinn bringing me water in hour three. The second picture is of Tony, Charles Fliescher (Comedian/Roger Rabbit) and Craig making fun of me in the background. The dumbest person that I know is me.

These are my good friends Dan and Martin Murphy. Dan and I went down to Kansas City to pick up Martin from art school. Most people keep a jar of wooden spoons on their kitchen stove, Martin keeps a full jar bottle rockets there. If Howard Dean would have been holding a full jar of bottle rockets during his famous "HEYAAAAAHHH!" speach, maybe he would be president today...



This is Sadie Allison, the porn lady. I was on KQ with her and I had to interview her about her sex toys. The stool was not one of them.



Things to do while in Kansas City...find a guy with a mohawk wearing a hospital gown and cowboy boots, smoking a cigarette while riding a chubby girl in a Karaoke bar...CHECK!

While I was in Omaha, Stacey from the Funny Bone had a formal party. She made Dan, Martin and I promise that we would dress up. So, we dressed up like it was 1992. I wore a collarless jean shirt, windbreaker, taper-fit Bugle Boy jeans, two toned Varnet sunglasses and a fanny pack that said, "Husker Power Lifter." This is Stacey tight rolling my jeans.

What's up ladies? Like DRAKKAR cologne? We each put on five sprays.

This is Dan, Martin and I the morning after the party. If this picture had sound, you could hear
Ace of Base playing in the background.

I may get older ever year, but my sense of humor is still being held back in the 7th grade. I was driving through the town of Platte, SD on my way to do a corporate party for John Deer tractor company. When I saw this sign, I had to put my car into park and take a picture. Right after I took this picture, an old lady walked up to me and said, "Oh, do you like the Dutch Oven? They make great rolls!"

Mom, you're the only one who goes to my website, so here is a picture of us! The black lab is Jenny and the yellow lab is our new dog Maisey. This was taken when I came home for my mom's birthday.

This is my adorable niece Liz. I call her cheeseliz. She was trying to hide from the camera in this picture. My old childhood bedroom is now Liz's room. Still has the ducks on the wall! I picked those out when I was nine!

If I put pictures of my cats on my website, does that make me a loser? Do I have to start cutting out "Cathy" cartoons from the newspaper? Will I have to join a scrapbooking club now? Isn't the Internet just a scrapbooking club for nerds with computers?

I got to work the Orlando Improv the week of New Year's.

This is TJ, the manager of the Orlando Improv. He chose me as his New Year's Eve kiss.
Lucky me...

This is Bree and Sarah at the Orlando New Year's Eve downtown block party. See what happens to nice girls when they play the song "Daisy Dukes?"

Keeping with tradition, every photo page of my website has to have a awful picture of my friend Sarah. Sarah is very photogenic, so I like to highlight the times when she is not.

chEEse and bEEr!!! Growing up in Wisconsin, we only like foods with two consecutive EE's in them. I hate very few things in life. One of those things is the Wisconsin Badgers. That is why this picture is so rare. I always cheer for Big 10 teams in bowl games though, so I decided to get all decked out when the Badgers played the Georgia Bulldogs in the Outback Bowl New Year's Day.

Orlando would be a sucky place to live if you hate kids. I'm still a kid, so I was in heaven.

Kids over the age of 21 can drink at the World Showcase in Epcot. Maybe the age
limit isn't enough?